{"id":43,"date":"2018-04-09T11:01:00","date_gmt":"2018-04-09T16:01:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/?p=43"},"modified":"2022-12-01T11:02:03","modified_gmt":"2022-12-01T17:02:03","slug":"even-words-fail-to-protect-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/poetry\/even-words-fail-to-protect-you\/","title":{"rendered":"Even Words Fail to Protect You"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Barbara Lawhorn<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The moments of greatest
tenderness, you don\u2019t share<\/p>\n\n\n\n

with anyone. Your newly come
daughter, in the moments after<\/p>\n\n\n\n

your husband abandons you both
for the Survivor<\/em> season finale.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Breathing the world for only hours,
at your milk-stone breast, wordless hunger<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and need unmet, unable to nurse. A howl
in you both, still there as she thresholds<\/p>\n\n\n\n

to teenager. Umbilical cord. You scissor it,
again and again. Your favorite professor,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

passenger side of the minivan you swore
you\u2019d never own. Wise and sorrowful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s not about you<\/em>, he said, not unkindly, meaning
it all. All of it. He read aloud to another version<\/p>\n\n\n\n

of you. Saved you from social work. Gently
questioned the idea of your marriage, so young<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and twenty years later, as divorce unspools,
he seems an oracle. His words a mantra.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Under your son\u2019s coiled rage, his heart
is a honeycomb. He has to fight you before<\/p>\n\n\n\n

you can pour him into your lap. Before his love
is something he can\u2019t contain. He is a jelly jar, shattered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can\u2019t hold his immense sweetness.
Mama<\/em>, he croons, half-song-half-sob.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The first man you invite into your bed\u2014into your
body\u2014into your brain, you love profoundly, expansively<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and without question. Maybe you shouldn\u2019t. You have been walking
without skin. Even words fail to protect you or articulate<\/p>\n\n\n\n

what is between you\u2014Steinbeck\u2019s folded map, creased with use,
such letters written, thousands of miles and three months<\/p>\n\n\n\n

traversed. You whisper he does not have to be
so gentle. Yes. Yes, I do.<\/em> His stillness shakes you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You press your ear to skin, listen
to the cadence of his heart, steady\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n

tires rotating on road as you slip
into sleep, child in the back seat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Good-bye. Good-bye. Good-bye.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Issue 9, 2017, pp 36-37<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Barbara Lawhorn The moments of greatesttenderness, you don\u2019t share with anyone. Your newly comedaughter, in the moments after your husband abandons you bothfor the Survivor season finale. Breathing the world […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-43","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=43"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":44,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43\/revisions\/44"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=43"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=43"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.muw.edu\/poetrysouth\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=43"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}